Learn to Swerve.

Answers.

Ever wish there was just a reference point you could go to for answers?

I don't mean WebMD, or google, both are fantastic, but offer nothing to help me out in my current dilemmas.

I'm just focusing on so many things in my life right now, that I can't just FIGURE it out. I know at some point there are right choices, and rightER, choices, and I don't want to make the wrong ones.

I just have so much to think about. Really makes no sense, I know. But delving into it now isn't an option. I just have to focus. And focus I shall.

I'm am however, doing some things for ME. to help me in this quest for answers.

I'm running again. Slow, and quite possibly as graceful as an elephant in tap shoes, but I'm doing it.

I'm also, for the benefit of mankind,  not making <------- that pose anymore. Passer-byers, on the road, and viewers of this blog can thank their lucky stars for that.

I'm ped-egging my feet. Not really going to help me become a better person, but those who happen to be standing behind me in the line at the post office, and glancing down at my heels, will want to utter such phrases, as "She must Ped-egg", and "look at the heels on that mom of 4." Really, it's bettering so much more than just me.

I'm embracing my inner artist, and putting myself out there, in a new collaborative creative blog, called Creative Therapy.  I'm a huge fan of anything therapy related, not to mention, it's got some kick butt designers, and Guest Designers.

I'm finally getting some REAL answers, about what's going on with Charity. They've given me some things to work with, and we meet with the therapists again on Friday to maybe diagnose some of her behaviors, and see how I can best mother her. She'll be 3 in less than 2 weeks, and while she is cute as all get out, the fact she can still only mimic few behaviors, and is about on an even learning keel as her 18 month old cousin, has me wanting to solidify some facts, and be the best mom I can.

I'm coming to terms with the fact that, my mom is gone. She will never be replaced, but women will come into my fathers life, and I will have to accept that. As disturbing as it is to think of my father as a "player", there are thousands of women out there, searching for stand up guys. And my dad just happens to be one of them. A man who was windowed, not divorced, is apparently a rarity this day in age, and while I hate to think of someone 10 years older than me, becoming my step-mom, I have to face facts. My dad's a good catch. If you've got a big enough fishing pole. He has even been referred to as "hot" in his quest for love. Ew.

I'm coming to terms with the fact that I will never again be able to wear a bathing suit in public, and while that may seem like dismal news, rumor has it, Alaska has no public beaches, so really, this works out in my favor, not to mention the fact that turtlenecks and long johns are approved swimming attire when the weather never reaches above 85.

I'm taking the advice of the Shape magazine columnist who encouraged us all to find a "feel good part". Something about yourself that you can love. When your skin is stretched, when your fat rolls have to be tucked into your pants, and when your bosoms rival that of a grandmother 3 times your age, tis best to focus on something else. I'm still debating between my soft heels, or my forearms. Both are equally awesome.

I'm setting aside time with each of my kids to focus on the things that make them tick. Find out what they need from me.

"All I need is an ipod, and some heelys". Says Mikey. Apparently we spend enough time together, his requests are more of the worldly in nature. Go figure.

I'm really just trying to finally find the balance I need to be the best mom I can, no matter what life hands me. I've been a mom since I was 19, and for so long, I took all that for granted. I never thought about the bigger picture. I'm not giving up my SAHM status just yet. I just want to make sure I'm being and doing all that I can, for my kids, my family, and as I already mentioned, for me.

This fits really well with the, I try really hard Actually sweatshirts the Fed-Ex man delivered today. I took some photos of me in them, but they appeared to make me look as if the only thing I tried really hard at, was eating all the food in the house. I think it was the angle. I'll try again later.

Thank you all for reading, I'm coming up on 100,000 views on my blog,  which is like, the biggest thing to ever happen to me, aside from that time I saw George Clooney at the airport, and I want to celebrate in style. I'm debating on how to do that, with the limited time, and scrapbook supplies at my disposal, but, I think I've come up with a plan. So don't go too far, (2 more days on scrapsmack, and I'll be giving away the goods in no time flat.)

Speaking of giving, if you want a chance to win the April kit from Label tulip, (which is seriously going to put the Free, in FREEAKING amazing, go Here  and give your ideas for names for future Label tulip kits. IT's that easy.

I'm going to go shower, that's one easy way to better the area around me, and go to sleep early. Thanks for all your support, encouragement, and comments. I never thought I'd have such an amazing group of people I could tell things to, and have them actually still like me. It's amazing what the internet can do ; )

As promised.

Some gazage. For those who actually care about that sort of thing. I know most of you come here for, what not to do, the prerequisite for parenting 101. Those not interested in either will surely be disappointed.

This is one for my mom. I still miss her so very much.

one for my girl. Born 2 fly. Play on words. I do that sometimes. Makes me less cool. But I'm ok with that.

One for the ol' estranged husband. About our 7 years together. Technically, it's a few more weeks, but Dang. 7 years? That's like a dogs life right there. Whoa.

And of course. One about me. There's always gotta be one of those.

I've been trying to scrap more photos on my pages lately, yet as I look over what I've posted, I see that single photo pages are actually quite dominant. I need to work on that.

On the life front, it's time for the tri-annual, make a new sweatshirt thing, me and my sisters do. See. We for some reason at one point, thought it'd be "cool" if you will, to make our own sweatshirts. We'd vote on a slogan, once a quarter, and then create hoodies, for the "group".

"The group", was the token name we decided for ourselves when we made our first sweatshirts. We had this joke since we were kids, whenever anyone would say something, like, I can recite the alphabet backwards, or read kosher labels on the back of cans,  we'd say, "Is that what you're bringing to the group?" Technically it was really obnoxious, and just another way of being snobby, but over the years we've inducted hundreds of people with useless skills, into the aforementioned group, and are still just a pathetic sad bunch if I've ever seen one. But with the group, came the first of our hoodies. The classic, coveted, "What are you bringing to the group?" hoodie. We had such a huge fan base, that group membership sky rocketed. People everywhere began approaching us, asking us what the group was, and how they could join. Turns out they just wanted free hoodies. I don't think so buddy.

Anyways. We've voted on a new slogan, and within 24 hours time, we will all be sporting navy hoodies, (the green was getting a bit overdone), that say " I try really hard, actually." a classic quote from juno. One of the best movies that ever was.

We are still taking applications however for the group, if there are those of you who think you have a skill that nobody else would appreciate. We take all sorts of cast offs who'd never make it big anywhere else. We can't promise you fame or fortune, but we can offer you a sort of immunity, not to mention, we're all pretty cute. So. Really. Think about it.

I've made it obvious I'm overdue on sleep, not to mention school starts tomorrow. Boo. On waking up early. We're big on sleeping around here. Or maybe we're big, because we sleep. I don't know. Either way. I'll spare you anymore blathering. I hope these layouts don't disappoint too much.

Look for more, as I still have tons of kit goodness to create with, and with all the time I'm saving, not exercising, I plan to at least work on one area of my life. Creativeness. Thanks for reading, and being such awesome blog buddies. The group thanks you. And bids you all. goodnight ; )

Scrappage. Much.

The world you know it has ceased to exist. I, Ruth Akers, have managed to scrapbook, not one, not 3, but 5 layouts in the course of 48 hours. 5!! All in the recesses of the night when my children are sleeping. It was actually kind of funny, because I told Mike I needed to wait until the kids were asleep so I could get some scrapbooking done, and I put them in bed, normal time, and Aubree just would not go to sleep, I kept singing to her, and talking, trying to get her to give up the ghost, and finally, she was like,
" I wanna know the secret mom".
was like. What secret?
"The ones that you're scrapbooking when we go to sleep. You can just tell me."

She apparently thought I was scrapbooking all sorts of things that cannot be named while she was drifting off. So I let her help me cut the papers, and paint the stamps. Just to prove, there were no secrets.
I also decided to use some of the photos I found of my mother for this kit, because I really want to start capturing the things I remember when they are still fresh. That little head in the photo below is yours truly. When I was 1 day old. I won't pretend I was cute. I wasn't.

Things are looking about the same around here. No view of change on the horizon. Just the usual my father looking for internet love, my family falling apart thing. But somehow, I know it will turn out ok. I mean, my mom raised us well. If we can keep going, we might just make it. Well. Other than that, it's spring break this week. Trying to get the kids out of the house once a day for some fun activities. It usually involves, me, a large car, 5 carseats, and alot of "OMGosh?. Are all those kids yours.?" Yep. Sure are.
I had him when I was 7, him when I was 10. and this one when I was 12. Good grief. I have some dignity. Or at least I used to. I do hope to have something awesome to report soon. I mean, I don't know what. Things can't get much better than dwelling in a basement, and living off your father. But if they do, you guys will be the first to hear about it.

Mia is getting HUGE. I mean, like, pulling up, taking steps, getting on the couch, trying to talk. I can't believe it. I just gave birth to her. At least that's what I pretend when I look at my stomach.
But, I have to make this short. Rumor has it, Horton Heard a Who, and my kids would are all about going to see it. So. Gaze. Gander, and come back tomorrow for the full monty. Ha. Right. I mean the layouts people. Enjoy your friday. I'll be back.

First, I just want to get to know you.

Long are the days in the week when your life resembles mine. Yet, still I persevere. Between the idea of scrapbooking again, for not one, but now 2 causes. Yes. I managed to secure yet another awesome opportunity. I was asked to use the Homegrown Scrapbooks spring survival kit to help show others what to do with it, and teach some layouts and page ideas. And teach I shall.

Have you seen the sneak peek for Label Tulip? If not, run with a quickness, and see what you can get your hands on. Tons of new CHA mingled with brilliant color schemes, and butterflies. Where do I sign up? Lucky for me, I'm already signed up. Speaking of signing up, I was tagged by a fellow tulip girl, the talented Alexis, to reveal 7 quirks about myself. I think most of you know the really embarrassing stuff. But there's a few things I have yet to reveal. So. What the heck.

1. I have a weakness for small children selling things outside of large chain stores. ie, girl scouts, boy scouts, little leagues, and the Shakina Mime dancers. It's me they sit there for, I look down, and find my hand reaching into my purse, and next thing I know I'm walking away with a few less dollars, and a cute little kid beaming in my wake. I guess there are worse things to be a sucker for.

2. I can't talk on the phone, without running my hands through my hair. It sounds harmless, but behind the wheel of a large car, with one hand on the phone, and one in my nappy hair, I'm a force to be reckoned with. I tend to pull over and talk for this reason. I happen to like life. Sometimes.

3. I cannot drink anything with ice in it. Absolutely cannot do it. I've been known to pull back around the drive thru and ask for no ice just because it causes me great pain and anguish to see it in my drink. I've not had ice in my drink since 8th grade, and I don't plan to start now.

4.I have 2 skills for which I am known through out the Kirby lineage. Scrapbooking, and expressive dancing to different food items. I have a routine I call "double decker taco with sour cream and guacamole." It not only sends shiver down my family's spine, but usually has us all running for the border.

5. I have a sickness when it comes to carpets and the dirt that resides on them. I could probably live in filth if my floors were clean. I wouldn't want to mind you, but if you gave me the option of no vacuum, or clothes on my bed for the rest of my life, I'd be sleeping on my clean floor.

6. I am allergic to cats. But only if I know there is one in the room. I've lived for weeks in the presence of cats, but it wasn't until I knew they were there with me, that I begin to swell, itch, cry, and cough with a ferocity matched only by an asthma attack. I suppose it's all in my head, but I can deal with that.

7. I could do anything in the front seat of my car, that you couldn't pay me to do in public. Dancing, check, nose picking, check, singing at the top of my lungs, check. The second that door opens, the bubble has been penetrated, and I am no longer alone in my world. My windows are not even tinted, but something about that wall of steel between me and the rest of the world makes me invincible.

Quirky, no. Weird yes. I need to work on that. I'm excited to get my first LT kit, and start scrapbooking soon. But in the meantime, I'm taking my time finding cute photos to use, and trying to solidify my style. My sister, who has never once wielded a craft item in her 21 years, told me yesterday all my pages look the same. Ah, ok. Well. Let me see what I can do about that. So, if I sway a little from the Ruth that you know and tolerate, work with me. I'm trying something. Other than that. Nothing has changed. I'm still living in my dad's basement, I'm still taking pictures of my adorable children, and I'm still as cool as I never was.

I'll leave you with the latest from a McDonalds photo shoot exclusive. These photos will be coming to a scrapbook page near you, very soon.