Get real.

You've all been there.
That awesome hour after the kids have gone to bed.
The house is clean. Well. Cleaner.

There's nothing but the click of dueling laptops on opposite sides of the couch as you and your husband search for whatever it is you and your husband search for on the internet.

He gazes over at you with loving eyes, and you can pretty much tell where this is going, as you slowly close your screen, and then he says...

"Why do people like you?"

Um. Scuse me?

"You know what I mean. Why do people read your blog, and comment. Why do they want to be your friend, Why do the guys at work tell me their wives like you. Why do you think people like you?"

I'm about to open my mouth and begin spouting off the obvious reasons one would be so inclined to want to hang with yours truly... My looks, my charm, my wit, my sense of style. When it begins to dawn on me... I have none of those?

Why DO people seem to like me? What brings the small masses to my blog, or to wherever it is they seem to be going for a daily dose of Ruth?

I would consider the fact they merely got lost, and were trying only to navigate away from the page and that could account for some of the people. But chances are there is a greater reason.

Never one to just accept I don't know for an answer, I set out on a personal quest to discover the truth. I toyed with the idea that perhaps it was my scrapbooking skills that had lured some innocents to my page. But I know that there are those who could care less what I do with a 12x12 sheet of cardstock and a sewing machine.

Maybe it was my ability to create mesmerzing blog design.I'll stop there. That one is most certainly out as a possibility.

I begun to read through the bits of email I have recieved over the course of my blogging days. I went back over posts and read comments to try to untangle the web that was my husbands somewhat rude, but very much intriguing question.

Of all the things I read, and all the bits I managed to combine. ONe thing is clear. whether or not you care about me as a scrapbooker, a mother, a friend, a daughter, a family member, a fellow myspacer, or a innocent bystander who accidently found your way here in a totally misguided google search, the common thread seems to be, that people think I'm REAL.

Real. While I can vouch for the fact that I am the only one within a half mile radius who is still 100% just the parts she was given when she born, a little bit more if you count the weight I'm managed to add, I don't believe you've any interest in that kind of real. MOre the honest to goodness, tell it like it is. My life is really this out of control to a fault. REAL.

I've come across people in my 26 years, that could possibly fit the definition of what I am the polar opposite of. I don't dare call them fake, because I truly believe some people are able to work out at 5am, have the kids home-schooled by 9am, the fresh bread baked by noon, a homemade lunch on the table by 1, the laundry sorted by 2, and the children sitting on the couch in freshly pressed threads when father walks in around 5 from his job on wall-street, ready to recite Emily Bronte while mother whips up a turkey in her unsoiled white apron. They do exist.

I however, am not one of those people.

If being real means telling your children to take the gallon sized ziploc bag of fresh picked acorns out of my fridge, along with the "flowers" that are beginning to produce an odor only a 12 month old on solid foods could rival, and assuring them that when it snows, the squirrels will be able to find their own food, makes me a real person. Then yes. I'm real.

If being real means watching adorable babies in the parents magazine being swaddled with psuedo handmade blankets inside the pottery barn crib with the educational coordinated stuffed animals in the corner so as not to pose a choking hazard, only to look over at mine in her unbuttoned slightly wet onsie, which doubles as evening wear, on her wal-mart activity blanket sucking on her fist blowing spit bubbles as her sister, still in her pajamas at 11am, sings her frosty the snow-man in the middle of september. Then consider me real.

If by real you mean, walking out to my car on a routine trip to wal-mart the cart begins to lose it's balance due to the 3 children hanging on to the right side despite my explanation of equal distribution of weight being necessary to move the cart in a forward motion, only to have the groceries I so carefully placed around the baby seat begin to fall in random places as I try desperately to stop my pants from falling off (due only to the fact that I'm sweating, not that I'm losing weight). If being that woman, makes me real. That's a cross I'm willing to bear.

I like to think that somewhere in my travels, ( I say travels, but I don't even own a passport. The closest I've come to being a jet-setter is driving through Canada on many a trips to and from Alaska), somewhere in my life, I came to the conclusion, that while it wasn't going to be a spring picnic, it could certainly be a meal worth enjoying. I don't have any insight to the future, but I like to believe that one day my children will grow up and take with them the things that we've taught. They will turn out just as perfect, if not moreso, than I imagine them to be.
Whether or not they decide they want to go to college and become Dr's. Or in Mikey's case, they want to be a cashier at the dollar tree, they will never have to wonder if they were part of anything that wasn't "real".

So often I see people, living lives that on the outside seem enviable, and I often find myself coveting those things that seem so perfect. I don't for a second believe that I would be any happier, or any sadder if my situation changed.

I take the good with the bad. I cry over the spilled milk, I cry harder over the spilled grape juice on my carpet. I yell when I think the situation warrants it, I shut my trap when I know silence is the best thing for those involved.

I drive too much, and I waste so much time it's unreal. I double park, and I have enough dust in my house to start a full scale dust museum. But you know what. I don't pretend for a second that my world is perfect. I write about the feces. I take pictures of the dents in my brand new car. I forget to close the door when I walk by in nothing but a towel, and permanently scar the contractors hired to paint my house. I do these things, and I'm not afraid to admit it. Because that is who I am.

Take it or leave it. If you've come hoping for imperfect photos of perfect children, be prepared to be fulfilled. If you've come for awesome scrapbook ideas that will inspire you to create, be prepared to settle for a little less. If you've come for tips and tricks on how to lose weight, hit your back button, and keep on moving on. If you're related to me, and are here to find out how I'm doing, be willing to read through 14 paragraphs of meanderings to get your answer.

In short. NO matter what it is you've come here for, Whether you like me, tolerate me, or just plain dislike me, I make no promises beyond the fact that THIS IS ME. There is no perfect outter shell covering up a slightly fat and creamy filled inside. I am full of flaws, as is my life, but they are REAL flaws. And I'm not afraid to admit that.

I really don't think my husband knew what kind of can he opened up when he asked me that question, and to be honest, I'm glad he did. If you want to share your reason with me, why you read, why you talk to me on messenger, why you call me a friend. Or why you wish I'd develop hives and grow excessive amounts of facial hair, I'd love to know. I think my husband too would enjoy the answers.

If I'm way off base, and you find me faker than Pamela Anderson's chest, please feel free to post that too. I've got thick skin.

(Just in case you were hoping for one of the other things mentioned. Fear not. I've got you covered.)

cute kid. Check.

a layout. Check.

and for those of you who could care less, just wanting to know how I'm doing. It's safe to say. I'm keeping it real ;)

Comments

[Kim Moreno]

Well Ruth... I love ya cause your a member of the muffin club, you rock the cardstock, and your just a fun gal! :)

[Amy Hummel]

LOVED this entry! People love you because you're real. You have the same struggles as the rest of us stay at home mommies... and sahm's are the only people that understand other sahm's!

... and although I do like to occasionally bake bread... I do it covered in flour... and I rarely get my mess cleaned up afterward!

I leave my laundry in the washer too long, and have to rewash it to get the mildew smell out.

I *forget* to put the dishes in the dishwasher until dishes are flowing out of the sink and onto the counter. Either that or when I'm out of spoons.

Lunch often consists of microwave nuggets, or PB&J sandwiches (today we actually ate doughnuts)...

We're definitely real here!!!

[laura vegas]

what a totally "real" post ruth! i honestly don't even know how i came across your blog ... but i do know that i've been back every day since that first time. several times a day to be honest. lol!

why do i come back? i love your take on life. everyday stuff that we moms deal with ... but you put such a sarcastic, humorous spin on it all. i love that you just put it all out there and don't give a hoot about what anyone thinks. i love your pics of your cute kids. and i love seeing your layouts ... i just love this new one ... the colors are just awesome!

keep doing what you do ... and telling it like you tell it! it's real ... and i love it!

[Mel Nunn]

Well I have always loved your work, since I first stumbled across it at scrapgal, and then I found your blog. You always make me giggle with your quirky ways to tell a story and the way you can scrap up a storm. You just seem one of those genuine type of people. Likeable. I guess you are the real Ruth :o)

[Kelly]

I first came because I wanted to see what you had to say about scrapbook design etc. I started reading your entries and realized that you were really honestly funny. I love your sense of humor and the fact that you are okay with admitting life isn't perfect.

[Mary Ann]

I came for the scrappin and stayed for the love.
Thanks for making my day, and everyday Ruth.

[kristina]

Love this entry, Ruth! :)
I love ya because you ARE real and you are so witty! ;) I think those two qualities are so great to have in a friend. Oh, and your scrappin' rocks, too. :)

[Katrine]

I love you for all of the things you mentioned: "My looks, my charm, my wit, my sense of style." And I also read your blog because I think we would be great friends! I imagined us shopping at Kroger and we would notice each other across the diaper aisle with numberous children clinging to us and we would become instant friends. But now that you are leaving Texas for colder pastures, I will continue being your blogger stalker, I mean blogger friend. You really make me laugh, encourage me, and make me feel like I'm not alone with your writing. You are talented. And you are real. That's why I'm here!

[Debra]

Oh Ruth, you are a daily dose of reality, the good, the bad and everything in the middle. You say things that we all think, but may not say out loud. I found your blog linked on another I read, and have been hooked since often checking daily for updates. Thanks for being so real, and helping me get through days I thought no one else could understand.

[allee]

Great post! I love that you tell it like it is. Life is not perfect, but the trick is to enjoy it along the way. Thanks for reminding us to keep laughing!

[ros]

I first came here for the scrapbooking. But what keeps me coming back is that you are a talented and hilarious writer. Fiction or non-fiction, real or unreal. I hope that one day you will consider publishing your blog as a book. "Learn to Swerve: Road Trips in Motherhood and Life".

[Julie Hickey]

Ruth, I don't know you, but I do know that you are hilarious and are REAL. It can be so tiring trying to live up to the Pottery Barn image, and who really wants to? I'd rather be covered in sand from the sandbox or glue and paint from the craft table anyday. You are one of "US". LOL!!!! You need to create a "muffintop gang" t-shirt and sell them. You'd have a posse all over the world :)

[Cathy K.]

You certainly keep it real, make me laugh, and sometimes cry, but it's all good. You are an inspiration in more ways than you know.

[Tracyg]

I love your whit, and your rocking scrapping style....and I can say I met you way back when..

[Tracyg]

I love your whit, and your rocking scrapping style....and I can say I met you way back when..

[Lindsay K.]

i have no idea how i originally found your blog. it was one of those i clicked on a link to one blog and it went to another and another and then yours! anyway, i come "check in" every week or so and you just crack me up. i love the way you create your scrapbook pages. i wish i had one-tenth of your talent! your husband doesn't need to know why we all like you........he just needs to know he is one lucky man!

[Ronda S.]

Well, one of the reasons I am drawn to check out your blog is you ARE real. We can all relate to you and sympathize, or offer support, or even realize we are not alone. You are brave to actually put out there your struggles and life's challenges. You are willing to tell it like it is, whether its good or bad. Flaws and all for all the world to see/read. That is admirable alone.
On top of that, I believe you are a very talented gal!

[Becky]

I love coming here and reading your everyday garbage because.. it's pretty much just like my days and I am a sarcastic person myself... I totally "get" your humor !!Most people don't get my sarcastic humor and think I am being bitchy.. but whatever I'm just keepin'it REAL!

[tara pollard pakosta]

I come here because of that very reason, to get a real dose of daily life and the humor you ALWAYS add to it. I can see your love for your family despite how hard each day can be and I see you always find the good in everything and i admire that and need it!>
tara

[Kat]

I read your blog almost everyday when my computer decides to work for me. You are "REAL" and you crack me up girl! You say it like it is and I love that.
I came across your blog because I knew you designed for Shirley (TSS)back in the day and I love your SB style.

Kat

[CK]

hahaha, you KNOW why I stick around ;)

[Anna]

I have to check up on you somehow, girl. And besides, who else could I do to TGIFridays and scam on the hunky waiters with? I like you because you're real, and you challenge me to be a better person. We have faced many of the same situations and still manage to wake up every morning and face another day. And what other friend can I say tried to cop a feel at my baby shower? ;) Love ya girl!
Anna

[Anna]

that should have read "go" to tgif with.... lol and reading that entry back, it makes very little sense. but I'm sure that you understand. And I like you for that too... your ability to understand my inane ramblings.

[Jill]

Thanks for being so real! I found your blog after reading and loving the Scrapbook Your Faith idea book your contributed too.

[Mindy Pell]

As usual a daily dose of Ruth makes my day start off with a smile! Luvin the new lo of your son, you kids are adorable.